Learning
to F.L.Y. (First Love Myself)
Living
by Proverbs 3:5-6
September
4, 2016
I can’t
believe a whole month has gone by since
I last posted a blog. The previous blog was the 1st part of a 2 part
entry from my workbook. When I posted the first part of week 21 I decided I
would post the 2nd part the following day. Well – here it is a month
later. My biggest distraction of course is work and the silly politics that go
on and still bring me down. I did added another distraction that has been
really really good for me and that is our Book club. We are reading Daring
Greatly by Brene Brown and I think I have finally connected the simple dot that
has me taking action and putting down the I am not enough and I am not good
enough badge. (it is not a badge of honor). I made a decision that I no longer
can wear that badge if I at all believe in God, believe in His Son and that He
died for me. That He wants me back Home, in His arms, with my family, His
family, our family. How can I possibly wear that badge and proclaim my
testimony, believe my testimony, live my testimony and wear that badge. The word
that came to mind was – hypocrite. Because I really can’t wear that badge and
say I am not good enough. He says I am enough, He has whispered that in my ear
over and over and over. He put me on a path to find my beloved Husband, who has
told me over and over and over again, I am good enough, I am more than enough,
I am beautiful and I am worthy. I have amazing kids who believe I am enough and
cheer me on in all of my endeavors. And I have friends who support me, love me,
accept me for who I am. I have a crazy good and fulfilling life. How could I
dare wear that badge. When I realized this every emotion I had inside me from
anger to joy came out. The anger at myself, because it kinda felt like I was
calling Bull-shit on God all of these years. And JOY at the simplicity of it
all. YES – I believe who He says I am, who I have always been. I put down my
badge on Thursday night – September 1, 2016 and decided it was time I start
wearing my crown! MY Crown – the Crown He gave me – the Crown He has been
pursuing me to wear all of my life. Well friends, I am here to tell you, I am
wearing it – and I am getting used to wearing it and soon enough I will not
take it off. And really………………it is that
simple! And that feels GREAT!
Now –
here is part 2 of my Angela Shelton Workbook from Week 21, July 21, 2015.
Discussion:
If your child was ill and needed care, what kind of
actions would you take?
The actions I took while raising my kids was 1. Home
remedies and try and make them comfortable. 2. If home remedies were not
working fast enough it was a trip to the chiropractor. 3. If 1 & 2 did not
work the Dr. was our next option.
You need a support system. Make a plan and gather
support before removing your sword.
Where do you get the most support in your Life?
·
My Heavenly
Father
·
Carl
·
My Kids, Ellie,
Kyle, Scott, Jessalyn, Nelson
·
Meredith
·
Bev
·
Allison
·
Teresa
·
Tobie
·
Most of the
Sacred and Treasured Team
·
Angela Shelton
Healing Worksheet:
I feel most supported by:
·
My Heavenly
Father
·
My Savior, Jesus
Christ
·
Carl
·
My kids and their
spouses
·
Bev
·
Meredith
·
Allison
·
Tobie
·
Most of the S
& T Team
The People who are most healthy for me are:
·
The same list as
above
Discussion: What does it mean to have team members
in your life?
It means I have people to talk to, to be real with, who
will encourage me and tell me the truth. To love me unconditionally and give me
healthy, honest, truthful feedback. That means everything. More important than
stuff.
Removing your sword is a process that you must
ultimately do yourself. Your team is your backup.
Who is on your team?
·
My Heavenly
Father
·
My Savior, Jesus
Christ
·
Carl
·
Meredith
·
Bev
·
Teresa
·
Allison
·
Tobie
Healing Worksheet:
If I needed help I would Call:
·
Carl
·
Mere
·
Bev
·
Teresa
·
(I would call the
person I felt inspired to call – I believe that person will be the person that
has what I need, the words I would need to hear).
I most trust:
·
My Heavenly
Father
·
My Savior, Jesus
Christ
·
Carl
·
My kids
·
Mere
·
Bev
·
Teresa
Discussion: Who do you trust? How can you find
people to help you?
Trust takes time to build, little by little, step by
step by spending time with someone. It really doesn’t take that long to discern
when you have someone who just wants a fake, superficial relationship or who
just wants to use you. (Although I have given my trust to people that fit into
that category). It does take time when you discern that a person is a possible
source of trust to build that trust with each other. Especially if you have
been betrayed many times by friends, family, leaders etc…..
Find therapists, support groups, friends and
supportive family members you feel safest with.
1. Who do I
feel safest with?
a. My God
b. Carl
c. Mere
d. Bev
2. Who would I
call if I needed help?
a. Prayers for guidance, who would be my best option, He knows
my needs
b. Carl
c. Mere
d. Bev
e. Teresa
f.
Allison
g. Tobie
h. Most of the S & T team
Healing Worksheet
The people who have inspired, helped and supported me
are:
·
Carl
·
Bev
·
Mere
·
Allison
·
Tobie
·
Teresa
·
Teresa
·
Aimee
·
Mindy
·
Carlee
·
Angela Shelton
·
Kelly Rae Roberts
·
Melody Ross and
The Brave Girls Club
·
The original Discovery
Training and leadership has helped inspire me and helped me in the path I was
on, so I want to include them. However there is a caveat on this as the current
leadership, have not supported me In my life and my mission and leadership has
hurt me deeply with lies and gossip.
The organizations in my area are:
·
Incest Survivors
Group
·
All 12 Step
Groups
·
The Journey
Training
·
Brave Girls Club
·
Angela Shelton –
Be Your Own Hero Workbook
·
Celebrate
Recovery
·
Sacred and
Treasured Women’s Retreat
·
Darkness 2 Light
·
Defend Innocence
·
Younique
Foundation
